Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
my being single is dangerous.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize