Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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