If i come over, it means nothing
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Why can't burritos get me drunk
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
