from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
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