hell yes lets make some ravioli
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
soo... how was my night?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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