And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize