things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
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you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
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I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
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