Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
