Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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