Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
