dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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