So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
