just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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