you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
