things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
you made out with another girl for some wings
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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