My liver just broke up with me...
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
