she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize