and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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