Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you

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(702): View more from Nevada

Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...

(1-702): View more from Nevada

ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha

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(410): View more from Maryland

I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?

(301): View more from Maryland

Nowhere

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(704): View more from North Carolina

the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem

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27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Read it at the TFLN blog
(708): View more from Illinois

High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...

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(917): View more from New York City

I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.

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(417): View more from Missouri

See! Theres potential!

(1-417): View more from Missouri

Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line

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