Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I think a kid would responsible me up
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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