I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize