Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
