I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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