She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Randomize
