dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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