i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
