I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
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