I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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