Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
