i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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