check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
