Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize
