I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Randomize
