In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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