Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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