Just cropdusted the office
is wine microwaveable?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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