I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize