got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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