she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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