Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
