Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
