so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
