Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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