i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
