It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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