just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Man, jail baloney is awful.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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