yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
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you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
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Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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