I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
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Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
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Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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