Hey man sorry I got all grabby
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
