She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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