biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
